I wrote this in my head about a year ago when I was running by the Point. Chunks of ice were floating in the river; it was a last blast of winter and it perfectly paralleled my internal landscape. Just when you think the worst weather is over, there’s a flash freeze in April.
At the time of writing, my emotions were too stirred up to see a way forward in the production. Given that it’s April again, I dipped back into the session wondering if I’d find a new perspective. Instead I found the worktape confrontingly raw and striking. I hear so much frustration, desperation, and defeat in my voice; I wanted you to hear it too. KM
Flash Freeze
So cold, I don’t feel a thing
It’s a flash freeze in April
Thought we made it to the spring
Then the wind blows in betrayal
I know I saw the signs
You stopped smiling with your eyes
All the words still rhyme
But your voice sounds strained and you won’t say why
So I bite my tongue
Grit my teeth
Try to play pretend
If I push too hard
I could push too far
Push you off the ledge
Tiptoe through tulips and around your moods
I am not surprised but I am confused
So cold, I don’t feel a thing
It’s a flash freeze in April
Thought we made it to the spring
Then your temper turns the table
You know you can’t stay small
When your true nature calls
Here you learned to crawl
But you dream too big for these four walls
So you clench your fists
Punch a hole right through
Let the house collapse
If you run away
Then you run the chance
That you can’t come back
Spinning in circles with the same old blues
You’ll never win if you stay scared to lose
So cold, I don’t feel a thing
It’s a flash freeze in April
Thought we made it to the spring
Then you pull the roots ungrateful
I never tried to hold you down
You can go fly free
And when the seasons finally change
You’ll forget all about me
Like cherry blossoms on the breeze
Once innocent and sweet
They blister in the sun
And end up trampled at your feet
Inevitably
Forget about me
So cold, I don’t feel a thing
It’s a flash freeze in April
I can shiver through the spring
It stings
But it won’t be fatal